My roomies and I have an obsession, that we are not afraid to display it.
When you walk into our apartment, you automatically feel like you're not the going to be the strangest person in the room. If you ask me, that's the best kind of welcome you can receive.
The doormat and fun glasses are both compliments of Urban Outfitters.
I've always wanted to do a makeup post and since I have received a few of compliments on my eye makeup recently, I decided the time has come. 10 easy steps!
1. Apply concealer (Instant Age Rewind by Maybelline New York or TruBlend Whipped Foundation by Cover Girl)
2. Apply a very little amount of powder foundation on T-zone (Bare Minerals)
3. Apply bronzer on cheek bones, side of the far head, nose, and chest and shoulders if you like (Bare Mineral's Warmth or Mineral Powder Bronzer in Sunset Bronze)
4. Apply blush to the cheeks (Narz in Orgasm)
5. Apply light gold eye shadow on the lids, darker gold or brown in the crease, and white shimmer in the corners and on the brow (Flirt! Glamourazzi TM Eye Pallette)
6. Put dark brown eye liner on the top lid and have it go up towards the crease and thicken the line as you get closer to the edge of your eye
7. Apply black eye liner in the water line of your bottom lid
8. Apply a fun, bright color cream eyeshadow on the bottom lid (Almay's Bright Eyes Color Cream Shadow in Lilac Lustre)
9. Curl and Apply mascara to eyelashes
10. Apply lipstick (Revlon's Orange Flip)
Don't be scared of up do's! I threw my hair in a low bun and loosely curled my over-grown bangs.
Getting dressed up in sundresses and pearls is the best way to spend your Saturday afternoons. I attended a Catalina Wine Mixer today, and I've never had so much fun playing dress up!
I've heard you have an 80% chance of meeting your husband/wife at college. And if not, well, as my Business Law Professor would like to say, "You're SOL" (Shit Out of Luck). This fact (where ever I heard it from ...so not even sure if it is really true.. sorry I'm not doing the effort to digging for the truth) is down right fucking scary. Between all the technology and social networking to the drunken introductions, how is a girl to get a little romance?
This summer I swore to all my friends I was DTR (a slure on DTF that replaced 'fuck' with 'romance'). I am a hopeless romantic and a sucker for flattery. But clearly nothing, and I mean NOTHING happened this summer. So My roommates and I have been complaining a lot recently about our love life (more like EXTREME lack of) and blaming the opposite sex for their stupidity or perhaps their pure aloofness of the entire topic. Yes, I admit, we were being extremely harsh but come on.. (these examples of stories we told each other) are you seriously going to fondle another girl (which so happens to be one of my new friends I just introduced you to) right in front of me? When the last time I saw you we hooked up and actually was going to confess I liked you? Or better yet, another scenario: we are texting since last semester and the after finally getting the guts to invite you over to hang out without all the partying and drinking to get in the way... You don't even text me until TWO days later and all you have to say is, 'Yo'. Yo?! Wow. I wasn't even worth a proper greeting, let alone an encouraging comment about how the night went or what's going on with me today. And since when have you EVER started a conversation with 'Yo'? Either I have a serious issue (because something surely has to be wrong with me and not every guy I encounter) or you, child are socially inept.
So, I have given up on guys and I am going to become a nun. Or a lesbian. Which I think some guys would grossly be attracted to, so nun sounds good to me. Anyways, here is an adorable video that puts all my interests in a 9 minutes video: film, fashion, makeup, music, dancing, and love. Enjoy!
So it is 'Syllabus Week' here at Penn State. Which usually means from when you arrive and unpack your stuff, prepare yourself for an extended, almost unnecessary, weeklong event of getting falling-on-your-face hammered and waking up hungover just to walk in to class, grab the syllabus, and hold on to your summer mentality for the remaining days you have left. For the most part people are too occupied with shotgunning beers and taking back shots to really notice that I am not drinking, but when they do it only takes about a curious, yet always kinda awkward look that lasts about 30 seconds and then they move on to their next binge drinking activity. My neighbors and the new people I have met seem so nice that I feel bad turning them down when they offer a drink, but I'm already half way through my 90 challenge so I can't go back on it now. Right? ...Right.. Yup I'm definitely right. And I'm still having a blast getting dressed up and going out!
Forever 21 red shirt; H&M hot pink, highwasted shorts; Lohemanns black heels. I wore this with lots and lots of gold and silver bangles and tons of rings. I love the color combination. My hair was relaxed and wavy and natural makeup.
Marshalls navy blue and sheer black top; black studded cutoffs; Marshalls open toed booties; Urban Outfitters orange bag; Lohemanns necklace. I wore my hair in the middle part and straight but teased and messy and my Revlon Orange Flip lipstick.
I used books to give my picture frames more height and gives it a more dynamic look.
I like the symmetry of the photos of my friends and family that are framed by some of my favorite shots I made and a water painting of waves. They center a piece my sister made for me for graduation.
I put my makeup in bowls that I made in a pottery class I took
I am still figuring out what to place in the shelves, but the hooks are a great way to keep my necklaces from getting tangled!
rope, nails, and clothespins.
The Starry Starry Night makes our living room look huge. The couch covers are king size sheets from Walmart!
This is a post I knew I would have to write and as the time keeps creeping closer and closer my stomach tightens, my heart races, and my breath quickens. Today, August 22, 2011, is my older brother's 21st birthday. There are many reasons I have anxiety about this particular day. First of all, the fact that tonight would be an all day, on going celebration of happiness, craziness, and of course, drunkenness. But instead, I sit by my apartment window, stare out to his old porch where all of his best friends still live, and think about how badly I know he wishes he could be here than getting better in Florida. And that what scares me the most. I am not convinced my brother wants to fully heal or is willing to hold on to sobriety. You see, the last time I saw my brother he told me he would do everything in his power to help our family recover, that he would write to me and fix our dysfunctional to the point of non-exsistant relationship. Not only did he not even bother to wish me or my sister a happy birthday that were both in June, he hasn't bothered to reach out to us at all. But instead he has contacted his friends, who I don't think could ever know how much he has hurt me, and told them how 'well' he is doing but how he misses 'home'. If relapsing, getting fired from the two jobs that took him three months to get, and getting kicked out of the rehab that my parents spent thousands of dollars on 'well'? Then Disney World is hell on earth.
A couple of days before I left for school my mom asked me if I wanted to sign his birthday card. I want him to know that I wish him the best, that I want him to want help, that I hope he finds happiness where ever he is. But it kills me that, from his actions (or should I say, lack of), that he has none of the same interests for me. It hurts more than any other rejection I have ever dealt with. I know I should forgive him, be the bigger person, and keep on loving him regardless of how he has treated me in the past. But I can't let go of the sting I feel when people tell me how great he is and how they miss him or sadness that takes over when I think of him. I try to think that I might be better off without hoping one day he'll write. So I didn't sign the card.
Well, here is to letting some tears out, trying to make peace with the past, and hoping to move forward.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
Today I moved all the junk and treasures I own into my very own apartment with 3 other roommates. Since I am currently living in the last year of teenager-hood (yes I made this up), it is more evident than ever that the inevitable is true: I am getting older. I am trying to appreciate the I have been given, to look forward to the time that lies ahead, while taking advantage of the time I have right now.
This black and white photo was taken when I was 11...
Pressed flowers I found in my old journal, to be symbolic of growth for the future (:
And finally a toast to enjoying the time I have now with my roomies! (and my leopard red shorts from Urban Outfitters)
My first 'How To" tutorial. Not my best - the camera wasn't tilted right to show me actually curling my hair soooo I'll do better next time :). Here is a video of 'How To Get: Voluminous Hair"!
After killing my hair with so many heat products I thought I would try to have a healthy relationship with my hair! I wanted to make a homemade hair mask.
(make sure the avocado is soft and ripe!) cut avocado in half
scoop out of the shell and mash up
mix in egg yoke and 2 tsp of olive oil!
I left it in my hair over night but you can leave it in for a 1/2 an hour or hour! My hair immediately felt stronger and healthier. Plus it smelled yummy!
I thought this picture was very romantic yet has a gloomy tint to it - very appropriate to the theme of this post, I think.
My dad's undershirt, Forever21 necklace, Anthropology belt, Marshalls maxi skirt, Lohemann's black heels and I am flaunting a fish tale braid!
So I've been asked very recently, in person and via comments on my blog, how my 90 days are going. I haven't addressed my absence of alcohol in a while and thought I should share. To be completely honest, it has been pretty easy. The couple times I have gone out this past week, I have driven. Since I think drinking and driving is the stupidest thing you can ever do, it has never been hard for me to turn down a drink when I know I will be driving home. Up at school we walk everywhere so the temptation will be harder. However, my other issues I have told myself I will explore more during my 90 days have been on my mind a lot. See, since I lack any real relationship with my older brother I crave to have some sort of replacement of male companionship - aka a boyfriend. I some how have deluded my mind with thoughts that if only I had a boyfriend, someone to actually like me (potentially love me?! what? ...na) that I would be a lot better off. You see, I wouldn't be so sad about my brother's empty promises if I had another guy to really depend on. Of course, I know a BF can't fix my problems but sometimes I think that someone special could make them a little more bearable.
Just because I have struggled with some issues I have also made some progress! I give complete credit to my family. The experience I had visiting my brother in rehab was hands down the worst couple days of my life. When I would talk about it in the past, I would actually get really agitated and upset. Sometimes even have to fight back a few tears. However, just recently as my family and I were sitting down at dinner, our weekend in Florida was brought up. But this time in a more lighter tone. In fact, we all couldn't stop laughing. The extent of how ridiculously horrible my experience was is actually comical.
It started off very pleasant: My sister, mom, and myself arrive first Tuesday afternoon. Grab a bite to eat and then catch some rays before the sun goes down. Then as we decide to go inside, we come to find out that we locked ourselves out and the key doesn't work. I have to shimmy up a palm tree, scale the building, and climb over the balcony to get into the apartment. Then on our way to pick up my dad and younger brother at the airport a wave of nausea hits me. I end up puking my brains out every half hour on the dot until 5 in the morning. I miss the first session of the family program at rehab the next morning but force myself out of bed for the second session to see my brother. Not only do I only get to see P. from across a room, I find out that no one is his group had any idea he had siblings (in other words, while everything in my life revolved around him for the past 9 months I didn't exist in his). The next day while in family program, I get my period, the zipper on my pants break, I have to change into my sisters shorts that are 2 sizes too small, and P. confesses to me that he has never even liked me. While there was no tear shed remorse shone by P., I didn't even get to receive an apology from him because another kid in his group started crying about his douche bag of a dad. Not to mention that the counselors working in the rehab try to tell me that I should emit myself in rehab because they think I am an alcoholic.
As you can tell, some of the details of the weekend really do suck, but the combination of everything was just so horrible that it's actually hilarious. I am really relieved that I am able to laugh about the worst experience I have ever had to go through. But as I said earlier, I give a lot of credit to my family - I absolutely adore them... sometimes :)
To show you the joy they give me, here is a little montage of footage and photography of my cousins graduation party!
My ride home from a fun night in the city was a little rough. It pouring down rain so hard that my car hydroplaned twice and the streets were so unevenly paved that it felt like a horse and puggy on cobble stone! It was so bad that one of my hub caps actually flew off (which I didn't realize until the next morning). My mother and I back tracked my steps and just when we had given up all hope, we checked out a section in the road that had recently been paved (literally the day after I drove in the city) and found a lot right next to the street with a hub cap treasure island! WE FOUND IT! Here is my rainy day outfit:
Going to a State school as big as Penn State has its great advantages, but some downfalls as well. One of my cons is that because the campus is spread so wide, dressing for class is not that exciting. Unless you want to die before getting to class, your gonna stick to wearing workout clothes. Plus if you up dress in anything more jeans and boots, you'll stick out like a sore thumb. But because I enjoy those 7 extra minutes of the snooze button on my alarm I usually throw on comfortable, easy clothes anyways. However, it's when it comes to going out of weekends that get me stuck. You want to be sexy, but not skanky; you want to seem chic, not crazy; and you want to stand out, but not freak people out.
this is a picture of how I wore this dress in New York:
accessorized with 3 black belts, lots of bangles and black heels. I like this look, it's simple but with a little edge. The dress is very tight and very short so I worry sometimes that it is a little on the 'street walker' side.
I wore the same belts but I added a sheer, cheetah button down on top (Marshalls); an orange satchel bag (Urban Outfitters); brown booties (Urban Outfiters); Revlon's Orange Flip lipstick. The jewelry I kept simple - layered 3 dainty necklaces, wore a couple bracelets on my left wrist, and one statement ring on my right hand. The sheer shirt overtop added more of a fun, high fashion flare to the outfit!
From Wednesday to Friday I woke up every morning at 8 AM to drive to Saint Joseph's University. For an hour and 45 minutes I spent my time teaching autistic children how to ride a bike. Unfortunately it dealt with a lot of running and I needed both hands at all times so I wasn't able to take any pictures or video's of my experience. However, I did write a song:
Ride
I've been trapped
Inside my mind
For all this time
This time
I know there've been mountains
I couldn't climb
But this time I'll be fine
be fine
So let me go
Let me ride
Ride, ride, ride
Without you by my side
Yes, I will fly
Fly, fly, fly
Time has flown by
Now, don't you cry
you cry
I was scared I won't lie
But just believe in me oh my
Oh my
Let me go
Let me ride
Ride, ride, ride
Without you by my side
Yes, I will fly
Fly, fly, fly
Let me go
Let me ride
Ride, ride, ride
Without you by my side
Yes, I will fly
Fly, fly, fly
This song is dedicated to Brandon, a boy who proved them wrong.
When I was down the shore I had very little opportunity to take pictures of myself. Sometimes I feel very vein when I ask someone to take a picture of me so I thought I could change it up and sketch some of my outfit choices this past week!
I wore this out to dinner with my sister
^This was a fun 'going out' outfit
I went shopping at Urban Outfitters in this get- up (I NEED TO STOP SPENDING MONEY!)
An organization that simply asks us to Give A Shit about SOMETHING and with that simple wish we can share with the world, and change it for the better. Plus this advertisement is hilarious. Enjoy!
After my eventful night at the Maroon 5 concert, I headed for The Jersey Shore for some TLC with my big sis (I had no internet access - hence why these posts are days late). We laid out, worked out, ate out, went out and poured our hearts out to each other. Enjoy another mini movie of mine!
The song in the video is a cover of Hey Ya by Obadiah Parker
Friday night I went to the Maroon 5/Train/Gavin DeGraw concert. It was hosted at the Susquehanna Bank Center - where I spent almost every summer in high school tailgating and getting drunk in the parking lot before going in and watching a concert from the lawn seats. It is where we would pack cases in our draw string bags, takes swigs of vodka in water bottles in the bathroom during the ferry ride over to Camden, chug beers in the parking lot, and then hopefully act sober enough be let in. I would pay probably $30 for a ticket and pitch in maybe $10 or $20 for alcohol.
For just about $10 more than what I would do in high school, I got tickets so close to the performers I was actually called up on stage with Train! I know, I can see it now - baby Gary Coleman's glaring eyes and scrunched up nose and saying "WHATCHU TALKIN' 'BOUT WILLIS?" Well, yes it happened AND you can see it too! Here is a lil movie montage of THE night.
The last month of summer is among us... usually in high school I would be cringe at the school supplies advertisement knowing that soon enough I would have to Spark Note my summer reading list and actually go back to doing school work. This summer I thought would be different. Although this summer was a much needed break, I was so sad to leave and honestly couldn't wait until I got to go back. Now the summer is coming to a close, I'm having that awful anxiety creep up on me. For reasons I think I can understand: 1. I will have to return to the school that still reigns supreme in partying and figure a way to stay sober without raising questions of my conversion to mormonism 2. I will have to start learning how to cook healthy and tasty meals on my own and (the most terrifying of them all) 3. I have to figure out what the hell I am going to do with my life.
This is what I am feeling.
I can only be 'undecided' for so much longer and my parents have put major pressure on me to pick a major ASAP. I have considered Education, but for some reason I don't think that teaching, although is an amazing career, would give me the outlet to do everything that I am capable of or aspire to do. I have considered PR, or Marketing but I have no experience or any idea what working in a business would be like or if I would even like it. I have been all through the Penn State website and I just keep wishing I had more time to figure things out. I wish I could take writing classes or business classes to see what I'd like - but that's what your freshman year is for and I spent my time exploring Education. I think I'd maybe even really like trying Film - but I think my parents would seriously want to kill me. But I think in all seriousness I want and need to be doing something creative and working with people.
I love photography, drawing, music, and fashion... I don't like economics, chemistry, spanish, or statistics. Someone out there, if you know a job that sounds like that - I'd love to know!
